Mindlessly.....

Critique from .
I'm not much of a poetry writer so bear with me.

The image was clearly perfect and the title was a great way to start the poem. However, after the first two lines, I felt it really just fell down hill. I see by the categories that this is a free verse kind of peom, however, even a free verse poem has to have some kind of pattern to it. Now, I don't mean patter as far as words or rhymes but rather, in this case, your stanzas. You go from four lines, down to two, down to one, to two, to three, to one and so on. While reading this, I can't really see why they are grouped that way and, in my opinion, it would be better group all as one large stanza. Now only will it help the readers but it will also help with the flow of this poem.

Now, poetry is basically prose with an extra amount of flow and creative words. That said, I didn't see your writing here as poetic but rather, I felt it would be better placed in a prose sort of light. Not only that, but the concept of the entire piece just speaks prose to me, not poetry and maybe its just because I write prose more than poetry that I think this. :/ Nonetheless, this is a poem and so, in order to make a better poem, I think you need to work of the flow and the way this is all set up. As I read this, it just sounded very choppy, so I went back and read it outloud and again, I still couldn't get the hang of how it was supposed to sound.

Adding more details about the forest surrounding this character would also help really sell this poem. However, I love the concept of a character wandering through the forest after losing someone they cared about, so good job!